This season past, beginning around Thanksgiving and until the first of the new year, Carol becomes an introspective soul of the utmost kind. It seems that it began in my youth, maybe around 10 years of age, and these days of inwardness and reflection continue to this time of my life,
There’s really no explaining it and I’ve tried numerous tasks (more shopping, partying, sleeping, eating, meditating, praying, etc.) to stop it from happening, but happen it must. I sigh and embrace the experience now. It has become as commonplace in my life as getting ready for winter itself, although it can be a bit more exhausting than that. Exhausting because it brings out and up every little emotion connected with my life past and present.
Yeah, try that one on for size.
Every year it’s a little different than the year before depending on what has been happening within my lovely life. This year it had quite a bit to do with grandchildren growing up and what that entails in the way of their independence, beauty within and fantastically unique personalities (not unlike their sweet parents) which gives an entirely smitten grandmother much to breathe in in the way of pride and unconditional love. So naturally, this year’s moments brought me to my knees, no doubt, because it was also a decade of moments to sift through. Deep breath out is important at this time along with a lot of smiling, laughing, joyfulness and thankfulness.
So this gives you a little smidge of insight as to what this four to six weeks of my life is generally like. You have your own times like this, to be sure, and even though it is wonderfully awesome, these moments magnificently leave my soul threadbare, delightfully ready for the new year, new decade and cool new things to come.
2020, I think I’m ready for you.